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[Books] [Coming Soon] [Contests] [Free Stuff] [Links] [Meet Mary] [Newsletter] [New Releases] [Podcasts] [Home] |
Featured Books
AppearancesCheck out my chat loop and publisher loops! Nothing "officially" scheduled. Other InfoBooks available from Changeling Press Books available from Ellora's Cave Books available from Samhain Publishing To subscribe to my monthly newsletter please send an email or visit my newsletter page for alternative methods of joining. To subscribe to my chat loop please send an email or visit the group site.
Reviews"The storyline was pure reading heaven..." - Talia Ricci, Joyfully Reviewed, for Riding Partner "This
novella is an erotic romance and delivers on both counts - it is quite romantic
and is full of some hot bed play." Marina, Cupid's Library Reviews for Revealing
Photos " UNDER HER SKIN is so much more than a wonderful romance, it’s
a lesson in love and acceptance. It is an experience not to be missed."
Recent Posts
My Podcast! Now, getting distracted... LibraryThing - a great idea! Dancing Horses Even Published Authors Get Rejections 52 Weeks of Weight Loss: Empty Hangers & Empty Dra... For once the weather people were right... Some Mid-Week Cuteness Why We Read 52 Weeks of Weight Loss: Compromise & the Real Deal 52 Weeks of Weight Loss: When We Gain
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Archives
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My goal here is not to inundate you with TMI information. However, as an erotic romance author, I wanted to talk a bit about sex and losing weight. Most women want to lose weight to look better. Sure, the health benefits weigh in there too. The truth of the matter is: most women aren't happy with their body. This leads us to lose weight and other measures to try and look "good." Another truth is that for women, our biggest sexual organ is our brain. That's why we like to read erotic romance. When we don't have confidence in ourselves or our appearance, then we don't feel sexy and desirable. This leads to loss of sex drive or not feeling comfortable having sex. Except, studies have shown if you try to lose weight just to look "good" then you're probably going to fail. You need to have a concrete goal in mind in order to achieve your goal. Otherwise, you're striving for that elusive "good" which seems constantly out of reach. What does this have to do with sex? Everything. Having lost almost 80 lbs (79.4 to be exact) as of this morning, I can tell you that my body confidence has soared through the roof. I've always been okay, if not loving my body. After all, we're all made in images of the goddess. Some of us just look more like the Venus of Willendorf than Athena or Artemis. And some of us, as I used to be fond of saying, were simply born in the wrong century. So while my self-esteem may have flagged in other areas, my body image was okay. I never really saw myself as morbidly obese. Just--well---goddess sized. For me, weight loss has done a couple of significant things outside the loss in clothing size and the sheer numbers. It's increased my libido (a scary thought) and it's enabled me to feel more comfortable in certain positions, and increase my repertoire of them. Not a bad trade off. And it bodes well for the research. (evil grin!) In order to do this though, I've needed a healthy body image. I have to be happy with who I am right now while working for changes. And the numbers don't lie. I can tell you from 1994/1995 to 2006, I had put on at least 80 lbs. Scary. And we'll talk about the emotional "weight" of those numbers as well as just the physical in a future week's column. I guess my somewhat rambling point is, be happy with where your body is right now. Revel in your femininity and your sexuality. Enjoy what you have. Embrace it. Use it. My "slogan" (for lack of a better word) is "explore seasons of passion." Those seasons embrace not only the wheel of the year, but the waxing and waning of our own bodies. Our ages. Our abilities. Explore what you have and enjoy it. You just never know what you might find.  
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